He Made Me Do IT With A Smile

I have anger issues. I denied it before, but I must admit: I am extremely impatient. I do not like waiting. Though it is a virtue - as we all have been told - it is something that I have not yet channeled within myself. Patience. The word itself sounds so reflective and zen-like that it makes me get a headache simply thinking about it. It's on the top of my list of loaded words along with its cousin, Tolerance.

Photo Credit: Google

Once upon a time, I would consider myself very self-aware. It wasn't until recent that I recognized that a breach had formed between my mind, body and soul. I was not in tune with what was going on with me externally (the forces from the outside world) and internally (the pressure I put on myself). Overwhelmed with wanting immediate change, I took extreme measures. Within a few hours, I declared myself a 2x/day gym goer, only healthy/clean eating foodie, student pursing writing goals and online classes obsessor and an avid reading money-maker. Setting, what I now understand to be, long-term goals to be accomplished in the short-term time period did more damage than anything as I was burnt out and worse off than from when I started. I felt more than defeated, and I had myself to blame. 

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Photo Credit: Google

Fourth of July weekend came around and I spent it with a person who I have always known to wear a smile. His dimples and flouride-free whitened teeth made me melt. I watched his chest expand and he stole the fresh air from the life giving trees that surrounded us on the nature trail. I envied his freedom. I wanted his passion for relishing in the beauty of breathing. Although I was jealous of the relationship he had with a natural environment, I was humbled by being able to witness it. 

Photo Credit: MM, Thank-you Sean :) 

My boyfriend doesn't "do" pictures, so his phone is hardly ever in view. We followed a variety of trails and I wanted to capture it all and send it to every social media app that I could get to work while in a remote place. He made it a point to never look directly at the camera. I didn't understand the importance of it, but now I do. Every still image I managed to get of him on our mini-adventure is of him with his back towards me, admiring the heights of the trees, the sturdiness in their trunks and the rhythms of the stream. He used the time to take in what he saw. I used the time to take in his experience.  

Granted, I did not record the entire trip, but a bunch of it is on camera. After spending 2 hours walking trails, reviewing footage and scratching mosquito bites, I've come to the conclusion that I am happiest when I am around people who make me happy. The familiar smile on his face relaxed me. His heart - full and loving - made happiness contagious. My recommendation: always smile.

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You're probably wondering what the first and second part have to do with each other. You know, how does patience and smiling come together to make a successful blog post. Well, from my experience, they are directly linked together. Here it is:

Everything that we do in life is done, ultimately, to achieve some kind of happiness. The disconnect that I had with myself needed to be resolved because, for me, it was so overwhelming that it stood in the way of my happiness. My decision to be happy was a choice. My original method for achieving it was incorrect because it was unhealthy, leaving me at the same place I was when I started. Smiling, laughing, and surrounding myself with a person enhanced my level of happiness, and it took a while for me to figure it out. 

Photo Credit: darealtalk.files.wordpress.com

It does not take a lot for us to be happy. Cherishing moments, such as the one I had, can be the key to a happier life. Yes! I said it: truly being present - without a phone, computer, SnapChat, Pinterest, FB, Instagram and the like - can increase your happiness. I was more than taken aback when I remembered what I had always known: a smile is worth more than gold... its priceless! 

I have made it a point to smile more often and live in the present. I expect to take each day one step at a time sans camera and sans overuse of any other distractions. I would hope for everyone to find one special thing that has brought them happiness, recognize it for what it is, and love it in the moment as you will never have that same feeling again. 

Best,

MM :)